I’m coming down with a cold. And I’ve got an unusually high work load this week. So when I came home from work, I took some Theraflu and laid down for a nap before I tackled the work I brought home with me.
I eventually got up and slogged to the kitchen to reheat some dinner, and all I wanted to do was have a few minutes to wake up and listen to YouTube while I eat my meal. My husband ate hours earlier.
But so far, he has pulled me in for a long hug I clearly didn’t want while I’m trying to take my food to the table, dug around in the ice tray, dropped dishes, interrupted me multiple times to ask if I need anything, and generally done everything except blink like a traffic light to get attention.
I get that he is incapable of being direct and asking for attention. I get that he’s not making an unreasonable request in wanting my attention. But Jesus Christ, can he be a little less annoying? I don’t pester him when he’s sick, tired and busy.
This isn’t him “showing me that he cares.” How it comes across to me is that he believes his clingy emotional needs are more important than the fact that I am functionally threadbare today and don’t have another molecule of energy left in me.
I wish I knew a way to ask for some alone time in a way that doesn’t have him retreating, emotionally wounded and sulking, away from me. It would be nice to be able to just say, “I’m sorry, I don’t have much left in my tank today. If I were a car, I’d be running on fumes alone. Can you just leave me alone until tomorrow when I hope to be feeling better again and am less busy?”
How does he NOT understand that making unnecessary noise and hovering near my elbow makes me want to scream?
But he’s all “I just want to HELP.” (This is not helping.)